Being Sick

Being ill is not something I am use to. It completely is ruining my health, mood, and my life! I am so frustrated because now I'm always tired and do not have the energy to do anything else. My head hurts, my body aches, and my voice is disappearing. Could this nightmare get any worse?

I believe (well I'm going to blame this on my sickness) that I am falling behind my work because of all the lost energy. Now, I'm not just talking about my school work, but also the community service I have been doing. Going back, think I got sick from my trip to California. One of the youth was sick and he passed it on to other youth, who passed it onto me. Then, it didn't help being outside for hours every week in the freezing weather when I got back to Reno. I need to protect myself better by wearing layers of clothing, gloves, a scarf and hat. 

This nightmare becomes worse when I gave my flu to my best friend and my dad. It's been two weeks and my dad is as sick as the first day his symptoms showed up. Yesterday, he spent the whole day in bed, losing his voice and energy. It wasn't all my fault.. I believe raking the dead leaves a couple days before in the cold weather got him even more sick. Unfortunately, I still feel bad.

Amy best friend couldn't go to school for two days and needed up given it to her mother when she was taking care of her. This reminds me of Frankenstein, when Elizabeth was sick and passed it on to her aunt/mother. Well, she is still not feeling better and her mom got so bad that, I think, she had to call in sick to work. It's not only my friends and family getting sick, but everyone around me at school. Sickness needs to end!!

Energized

I have so much love for the world. I have so much love for humanity. I work to change the world so that everyone can live in peace. When I speak of these things I become energized and alive. I'm so glad to have been introduced to serving my community and making a difference. I didn't always think like this, before I was definitely self-centered and a bit selfish. I'm glad that time allows for change to happen and actually believe that I am different from even a couple months ago. I feel that people just think of me as a typical teenager who only cares about having a boyfriend and being popular and not thinking about anyone else. I'm going to pass that's the way I wanted to come out but no I want my image change. I don't want my teachers to think of me as that irresponsible kid who doesn't care much about doing her work and turning it in on time. I rub off everything I'm against and I don't understand why people don't see the real me. Could it be that they judge me on my image before I even speak? Or could it be of my past and what they've heard about me? This just pushes someone in the opposite direction because they think I'm something that I'm really not. I'm not some party animal, some wild child, some crazy addict. I'm a human being and I have feelings. I care about everyone even if I don't know them. even if they don't like me and especially those that are close and dear to me. I just wish the kids at school would get to know me so that we could all be friends instead of not really being comfortable to talk to everyone. 

I don't want to be the typical teenager. I want to be me. I want to stand out and I want people to introduce me and be proud of who they're introducing. It's time for judgment to be put away and for people to open their hearts to strangers because they'll never know what their missing if they never discover it in the first place. I can honestly say I'm happy, happy with my life and happy with the people that are in my life. I'm happy for my family and for my home. I'm happy for this amazing country that allows me to have a proper education. 

Now with pure, radiating thoughts running through my head, I want to make a difference... Not to be lazy and slack. I'm going to be a part of something. I'm so energized. I'm so excited to see what the future has in store for me!

Time to Breathe

October 11th, 2013

Break is a time of leisure, far away from school, classes, and schoolwork. It is a time when it's acceptable to go to sleep at 4 in the morning. and not expect to wake up at 6a.m. It is a time to spend the night at a friend's house on a weekday and not go back home for a couple days. Honestly, a break is good for everything, such as: from school, parents, society, and the world. It would be luxury to get away from everyone and everything for a length of time. Unfortunately, for me, that is not going to happen.

As of today, I have to go home and organize the papers that are all over my floor, desk, bathroom, bed, and closet. Once I let something get out of place, the entire room crashes into the disaster with it! Next, I need to catch up with Hamlet. I need to continue writing the summaries as well as doing the act analysis. I really enjoy Hamlet, even though I know there won't be a happy ending. I understand the text pretty well, but still have difficulties trying to figure out what is being said.

If I had to pick which of my classes was the hardest, I would have to go with Calculus. sometimes, I cannot wrap my head around what is trying to be worked out. It's like dealing with another language and looking at the paper, thinking how can i understand this! Just as you think you figured out the problem, there is another one ready to bring your spirit down. I like Mr. Judy. He is kind and understanding. He gives us days off with homework, which I really appreciate. If his class was easy for me, he would be my favorite teacher. Over the break, I am planning on reviewing some of the chapters that we went over to better understand the problems.

Next, I have to deal with Biology. I am so far behind with reading the textbook! I want to read it to better understand the class and have an A because Mrs. Vargo is a tough, non-lenient teacher. I like that some days and then hate it most days. She is a good teacher and I love her class. Every minute in her class enables me to learn something new. I just wish she would be more flexible with her rules and catch up with her grading! I'm planning on finishing all the chapter all the way to chapter 7.

Break here I come! <3

My best friend

You are Special

Flowers bloom and grow to bring beauty into the world

As had you from your mother's womb to bring joy to the hearts of others

Your love captivates all those around you 

You are tough
You are determined
You inspire me to follow my dreams and live life to the fullest
Without you, I wouldn't be where I am.

Gratitude for having you in my life
Gratitude for being able to hear your words of wisdom
Gratitude for being there for me in the worst of times
Gratitude for the times I can see you

Distance is what kills us, but drives us to hold onto our friendship even stronger.
Memories are what allow me to smile through a rough day
Just remembering us together makes me light up
You are my sister
You are my heart
You are my everything
I would give the world for you
I miss you

It's hard to go through the day being apart from you
Don't forget about me because I will always hold you close to my heart
Always be kind to others, as you would be kind to me

Look forward to the future
You and I
Don't you worry there my honey, we might not have any money
But we've got our love to pay the bill
Those days that are cold, I'll always be there to shelter you
I won't ever let you down. 

New Views of the World

Guatemala! What a beautiful country! Last year, I was fortunate enough to meet this amazing family who lives in Guatemala and comes to Reno once a year for a couple months to visit friends and family. They started in Guatemala by serving in the community with their business and just fell in love with the people so they stayed. Now, I am friends with their kids, Calvin, Devon, and Emily. We didn't get to know each other that well until this year. These kids are amazing, kind, caring, and compassionate! I become happier every time I see them! Calvin, when he was 16, started his own charity for the Guatemalan families so that they could have built in stoves in their house. He is too cool! He inspired me to begin serving and giving back to my community.

Tonight, I hung out with them and their church group. These guys are Mormons and every Tuesday, the youth get together and hang out. This time, we went to an area downtown, where we stated a bon fire and played volleyball. It was nice to see what they did with their church. It was pretty special. After some sports and food, they had a discussion of all the things they were thankful for. Everyone shared with such honesty and openness that it brought such love to the environment. I felt so comfortable with them and wanted to stay if i didn't have so much homework! Biology and English are a pain in my fun life.

They are leaving in two weeks and honestly, I'm going to miss them more than they are going to miss me. They agreed in taking me in for a year if I ever got to Guatemala.

California Training

This weekend, Rosie, Lily, and I are going to California! The reason we are going is because we were invited to attend a training to allow us to learn more about the Spiritual Empowerment Programs (SEP) that we plan to start here. It is a great way to educate ourselves more in the things needed to be done for the SEPs. Also, I am excited to go back to all of my friends in California. I met these youth just this summer and now, I see that as family. They are incredibly powerful with all their positive energy and pure hearts. I can't wait to introduce Lily and Rosie to them.

I am a little worried how Lily is going to take this weekend. She hasn't been going out with us, so she'll be new to everything. I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable or left out because this weekend is intended for Baha'is. Lily is also not very religious, but has her beliefs. I'm happy she is coming because Lily really needs a weekend away from her life here. She needs to meet new people and start to having other views towards life. I hope this brings joy and light into her heart, like it did for me over the summer. Then, there is Rosie. She really enjoys being only with her other friends and not socializing with anyone else outside that group. She claims to be shy, but whenever I have introduced her to someone new, she automatically shows her natural personality, the one I see every day. I think she just doesn't like the idea of emitting new people because that worries her. I'm hoping for the best because this is the first road trip alone with my best friends! 

Incredible Experience

Yesterday was amazing! 

I went out with Wendy and Rosie to continue with our service project for the junior youth. The girl we were suppose to meet with bailed last minute and went with her friend. We didn't have anything to do. Luckily, Rosie invited her friend Ana, so we continued, looking for kids for our program. At first, it felt like a loss.  No one was out and and some truly didn't care about the service project we were about it start. That didn't discourage us, just brought us down a bit. It was starting to get dark so we headed back to the car. We decided to ralktoone more family before we went.

As we got closer, I realized that I knew one of the girls. She was Maria's cousin, Claudia. I had met her three years ago when I went to Mexico to see Maria. It was incredible! She had moved here for her education. She didn't understand English at all, so she was reading books and taking different classes. We also met Maria's other family, and it just felt so right. We were all very comfortable and just having conversations, but still focusing on our goal: starting a spiritual empowerment program. Everyone was accepting and loved the concept of the program. They wanted to join! What a small world this is. I'm so happy that we talked to them.

Scores

Lying comes with consequences. I have heard that saying so many times from my parents, friends, and television. Honestly, I wish that everyone would be honest to each other, but in a way where  honesty wouldn't hurt other people's feelings. It would be marvelous for the hearts of the entire human race to be filled with so much love for every individual that acts of darkness wouldn't exist. That would be a wonderful, and possibly, perfect world to live in. Going back to my first thought, lying is a terrible deed. From personal experience, it brings pain to you and the ones you love the most. It's an unnessary act that puts you further from God. For example, last Friday, I went to sushi for Victoria's 18th birthday. We were all sitting at the bar, enjoying our sushi, when the person next to me started a conversation with us. At first, we didn't mind and it was nice to meet someone new, but it became a bit uncomfortable to answer the personal questions he was asking us. On stead of telling the truth, I told him lies. I didn't think much of it then. I mostly thought it was funny and so did everyone else. in the end, he asked me to be friends with him on Facebook, and I didn't want to be rude so I said yes. All the lies that I had told him would be discovered once we were friends. I felt horrible saying those lies to him, so much so that I wished to take it all back. Even though I didn't know that guy well, I still didn't want to be judged by him or lose his trust. I'm slowly starting to see that even the little lies can go a long way. 

Truthfulness and honesty are the virtues I still need to accomplish fully.